“Let no man pull you so low as to hate
him.” – Martin Luther King Jr.
Many of us feel justified in
our hatred. When someone or something you have fondly created or deeply love is
taken away from you all you can think about is hatred, anger and maybe even
revenge. The word Hatred in itself is a profound descriptor. When you
experience it, it goes beyond the realm of nouns, verbs or adjectives. It’s a
really strong experience, almost like a tremor within ... waves of hot crimson vengeful
energy pushing through your heart, mind and entire body, obliterating your
intellect to everything around you. Maybe that's
why our actions are very irrational when they arise from anger. The physical,
mental and psychological reaction seem so foolish and uncalled for when we look
back at them after a few hours, days, weeks or even years. And that’s because
the anger arose from an area of utter nonsense.
So the key question here is, “Is Anger
Favourable?” Then ask yourself "Am I truly contented and joyful when I'm
angry?" The answer is a resounding NO. We may feel a heady rush of spectacular
physical energy due to the sudden adrenaline kick, but mentally we feel all messed
up. Additionally, our verbal tirade gets catastrophic. We may yell loudly, say
a lot of horrid things that we don’t really mean or are true, and wave our fist
or fingers rudely at the other person. Under the influence of anger, we end up
doing and saying a lot of things that we regret later. Unfortunately, your
repute and years of trust get damaged in a few minutes of unrestrained anger...
Thus, it’s obvious to see that anger and
hatred achieve nothing lasting or gratifying for you. But alas, situations will
continue to abound and arise constantly testing you patience and anger levels
every single day. If only one could domesticate this wild beast...so many unpleasant
consequences and painful memories could be avoided.
The good news is that this is not too
difficult a task given that we humans are rational, logical, intelligent,
evolved beings, capable of reason and reasonable judgement. If we look within,
we will comprehend that the blueprint of our reactions can be found deep within
our mind. Many a time, self-defeating behaviours arise out past hurts and
ignorance. Similarly, the key to success also lies within. Through a regular
process of self-discipline, introspection, self-awareness, and consciousness
comes the knowledge of the defects and defeats of anger. And from that arise
the converse positive behaviours of love, mercy, compassion, tolerance and
peace.
Inner peace cannot co-exist with anger. Indeed,
negative emotions challenge the very foundation of peace and happiness. When
you gradually learn to control your anger and show its reverse via love,
empathy, acceptance and serenity, not only will you remain in peace, but the
anger of others can only slowly diminish. Peace of mind can only be achieved
through a daily meditative and conscious process of generating loving kindness
and tolerance towards others and yourself. And it is through this recurrent process
that anger and hatred can be finally wiped out from your thoughts, vocabulary
and deeds permanently.
As Master ChengYen says, “To be angry is to
let others' mistakes punish yourself. To forgive others is to be good to
yourself.”
Be kind to yourself. It is but one precious life you have. Make the most of it and fill every moment with unbridled joy, love and peace...
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