I love fairy tales for their magical
beginnings. “Once upon a time . . .” “In the beginning there was . . .” Every
story, chronicle, legend, or old wives tale commenced with these prized words
that would fill my heart with anticipation and joy as I looked forward to an
amazing fantasy ride with princesses, dragons, towers, faraway lands and a
happily ever after finale...
Fairy tales taught me very early on that
wherever the narrative transported me, however gloomy and arduous the plot,
there was always space for hope, redemption and love. These tales brought out
the optimist in me, and re-endorsed my belief that the sun will always shine
after the storm has passed.
As I grew older and the grind of life caught up, the
happy beginnings and endings of fairy tales became a distant memory. No matter
how tough a situation, or how close I came to an end point in my personal or
professional life, I had this weird notion that
I simply mustn’t give up in the middle of a situation in the hopes of a happy
ending, because I had started believing that there were no blissful endings.
After all, those were just fairy tales!
But Life is the Great Teacher. As I
matured I realized that I had little control over how my story began or was
fated to end. I also learnt to gracefully accept that all beginnings must have
an ending. Every candle must dim out and return to the darkness. Every bud must
flower and yet return into the bosom of Mother Earth. The sun will rise to only
set again. And everyone I loved would go back from whence they came.
As I learnt to let go of control and
gave myself to faith, I also discovered the power of jumping out of the past,
living fully in the present moment, and looking forward to an uncertain future,
albeit an ending. I let go of negative people and blame games, and I stayed
committed to the belief that no one controlled my fairy tale, but me.
I became a lot more cheerful with regard
to endings. Instead of letting a tide of futile emotions submerge me, I began
to level headedly acknowledge when a career, a relationship, or a life stage was
completed, to absorb what it had taught me and recognize its significance to my
growth. It meant sensibly departing from what’s over without refuting its existence
or its importance to my past. It involved inculcating an attitude of hope, faith,
and trust that every exit was a magical doorway, and that I was moving upwards
in my own fairy tale, rather than down or out.
Yes, transformations and endings are
disconcerting and painful to those who resist change, but sometimes all you
need is a total collapse to enable a brand new fairy tale beginning!
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