For the Beauty Lies Within the Pause

“He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed.” – Albert Einstein

Effective communication has become a rarity, given the manifold distressing situations, emergencies, stringent deadlines and pressures facing us every single day. Meaningful dialogues have become exceptionally uncommon, especially in high pressure, heated situations. It’s more so difficult because rarely do we pause to pay attention to what the other person is saying or even to what we’re rattling off, therein defeating the very purpose of our verbal exchange.

Mindful communication is both an art and a science which means being present in what you are saying, while you are saying it, with an accepting and nonjudgmental attitude. It showcases your genuine engagement with the dialogue and a willingness to undertake the conversation with a higher objective. It displays a synchronized, calm, in the moment, broad minded attention curve while conversing with others.

How do we practise this every day?  Inculcate the habit of bringing attention to your words. Be aware of what you’re saying, while you are saying it. Observe, don’t evaluate. Pay attention to others with a committed moment-to-moment awareness. A few simple easy to remember tips when synchronizing your body and mind while talking include:

1.     Speak Slowly

2.     Articulate Clearly

3.     Listen to Yourself

4.     Listen to Others

5.     Be to the Point, Simple and Concise

6.     Regard Silence as a vital part of the speech

A lot of right words and fancy terms can be very effective in browbeating your verbal opponent, but no word can ever be as effective as a rightly timed pause. When you notice your conversations spinning out of control, breathe in deeply and press the pause button.

Good mindful communication is essential to any healthy relationship, personal or professional. The choice is yours. You can opt to hit the panic button and continue a mindless dialogue with an aim to win and prove your superiority. Or you can simply press the pause button and momentarily freeze the entire scenario in front of you as you figure out how to astutely play it out. In that rare second of pause, think through the situation well, contemplate, recognize the consequences, and determine the benefit or loss that may accrue causing you perhaps a lifetime of happiness or regret. 

Mindful communication can make or break a scenario. And the pause could hold that vital key to a successful dialogue. As Lori Deschene says, “Practice the pause. Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you're about to react harshly and you'll avoid doing and saying things you'll later regret.”