If the Social Media Mirror Crack’d?

In my previous article entitled ‘Are you Invaluable’ I received a lot of feedback from youngsters on the pros and cons of the growing precedence today of creating well crafted profiles across multiple social media platforms, all aimed at strategically boosting their visage and thus their ‘self-worth’. Interesting point of view, and a noteworthy subject for debate and discussion.

We live in an age where people are quick to judge and asses others based on subjective perception rather than objective reality. Where ‘packaging’ is treated as being more important than ‘content’. At a time when people are in doubt of their genuine self-worth, unsure about their future goals, and are in desperate need of their real selves being seen, heard and appreciated, this contemporary scenario may be counterproductive.

The Social Media scene vindicates this fact. No other medium enables people to reach others so rapidly with the power of ‘perception’ overriding ‘reality’. You may have 5,000 FB friends, 12,000 Twitter followers and 1,500 LinkedIn connections, but does this define your true value and impact? It only showcases your ability to effectively construct an online identity and habitually feed it with well crafted information and visuals required to further embellish the fashioned identity. The perceptual power of social media platforms have allowed people to position themselves as self proclaimed ‘gyaan gurus’, while the real experts are yet to be discovered or have decided to share their knowledge with niche target groups via selective interactive sessions.

The way people use their social media vehicle reflects not only their intellect and persona, but also the deeply rooted feelings they have about themselves. It reveals their level of self-worth, willpower and originality. People with lower self-worth worry more about what others post about them on the medium, whilst those with higher self-esteem spend more time building their personal brand, adding greater value to their audiences with original information provided. And of course, there are those with phobic tendencies who spend more time monitoring their FB wall, replying instantaneously to messages received and deleting unwelcome posts that affront their perceived self image. The more hours you spend addicted to these social media platforms, the more you feel that the items posted in the virtual space are an extension to your real identity.

Social media is still an evolving platform which requires a greater level of comprehension, commitment and responsibility.  If you are active on social media only to increase your number of friends and connections without offering any real value during the process then you are doing it for all the wrong reasons. The aim is to add value to the audience that you are connecting with, and if you don’t value yourself, you are being irresponsible to those who expect value from you.  

These virtual platforms must not become your only mirror for “self-valuation”. Unfortunately many people have become obsessed with managing and tracking their online presence only because they have falsely confused it as a platform of evaluating their ‘self-worth’. I shudder to think of a day in the future if the social media mirror cracks! Will that distressing moment expose the real value of a generation that grew up on believing that this medium aptly captured and reflected their ‘self worth’?

So how does a youngster differentiate his self worth between the falsehood of the number of likes received on these online platforms versus the real thing? To begin with, juggle your time prudently between building both online and offline channels of connect and communication. Balance is vital. How people respond to you, your views, thoughts, opinions and actions in the real world need to be similar, if not better, to that present in the online domain. You have limited time in this world, so use it well and create a positive and lasting impact. In the end, that’s all that you will be remembered and valued for.

Don’t waste your time in comparative assessments. Whenever you compare yourself to others, you risk losing your identity and further minimizing your value. It’s appalling to see how many talented youngsters spend valuable time regurgitating someone else’s quote, opinion, dream or product rather than valuing their own selves enough to create their own unique ideas. Drive yourself to innovate constantly. The minute you indulge in a cut-paste display of someone else’s content you have weakened your ability to think out of the box, innovate and grow. Instead focus on your exclusive skill sets, views and passion, and create your own unique magic.

As elaborated in my previous article, stop linking your self-worth to the expectations of others. It’s disheartening to see so many able youngsters blindly following the herd and allowing their views and their lives to be defined by others. If you are living or portraying an image that is linked to someone else’s expectation, then you are living a lie and wasting your life. Discover your true identity, take charge of this real identity, be true to who you are, and fearlessly uphold your true self-image in the virtual and real space. Surround yourself with online and offline friends who believe in your dreams and add value to your self-worth, not those who repeatedly pull you down or falsely, or worse yet, consent to all your views, therein completely distorting your self-image.

As we evolve to a value based era, it will become vital for the youth to balance knowledge with application. They will have to become living examples of what they preach. And for that, inner value, trust and strength are critical. These espoused values will become the foundation of their self-worth, their handiwork, their legacy and the pillars around which future generations and economies will be created. Originality and innovation will become imperative. Values and real ‘self-worth’ will become more central than ever before. 

It’s a thin line between real and perceived ‘self worth’. While spending adequate time on these social networks can boost your self-esteem, getting obsessed with your online identity and others perception of you in the virtual space may border on narcissism and paranoia. Social Media is a mere extension and enforcer of society’s need to connect as also its obsession with itself. While these sites can help build connect and in the process enhance your identity, they are not short-cuts to building self-esteem. Building genuine ‘self-worth’ is a long and tedious road, and can only be achieved by balancing genuine relationships and accomplishments in both the virtual and real world.